Last night I was watching a TV documentary on PBS about the brain injuries that American soldiers sustain as a result of a nearby explosion, and the fact that almost always such conditions are not paid enough attention to. I remember the same phenomena during the Iran/Iraq war and we had lots of these people coming back from the fronts and even though they looked alright they behaved strange and screwed-up, we used to call them Mouji (translates into Wavy, referring to the explosion wave), there was so many jokes and funny stories about them, after lost night I admit I feel very bad and I don’t feel it is funny anymore (a few days ago in Tehran, one of these guys took hostage all the students of a girls' school, including his own daughter! ).

My son Danial is in grade one, there was a great deal of medical and language proficiency tests that he had to pass before he could start school in California. His Iranian background (non english speaker) and the fact that prior to coming to US he was in a French school were the reasons for the language test, fortunately he passed it. One thing that I am seeing here is that the educational system in this specific district is very similar to what we went through in Iran. Very strict and lots of tests and work are administered even for first graders. That was not the case at all in Canada, even though Danial was going to a French school in an English dominated region, and they are known to be stricter than the English schools, the curriculum was relatively relaxed, specifically for the first graders the stress was on the development of social skills and the interest in school and learning.

In contrary, here they are doing serious math stuff and reading, I would categorize the American system (where we are living) more traditional and the Canadian system is more liberal.

I really don’t know which system is better, I did not like too much pressure back in my school years,

Long live MIT!!

I have been looking for an opportunity to study a little bit; taking a course may be or study books…

Yesterday I found out that MIT has an online service called open courseware (http://ocw.mit.edu/index.html) and the course materials of many of the officially offered courses in MIT are available on this website. I picked up a few and am planning to follow through…

That is a good Idea, why the rest of Universities don’t do that?

We had a two-day holiday last week, including the weekend it added up to 4 days which was nice. Thanks giving is much more serious here than Canada, I am not sure why that is so, it might be because of the religious aspects of thanks giving and the fact that the Canadians in general are less religious than Americans.

Another interesting thing to see was that even the Iranians are into it, we were invited to a thanks giving lunch which had turkey on the table and so on and so forth. Not a bad Idea.
One good thing about southern California is that you can feel you are at home because of the all Iranian stuff you have there and the land itself, it looks more like what we had in Shiraz and most parts of Iran.

I was watching a documentary on World War II and of course the role of Americans in all that, especially to bring it to an end. When you look at the events and military operations there, specially the last two atomic bombs in Hiroshima and Nagasaki, you see how in American style the goal justifies the mean, whatever the mean is. I cannot deny the concrete achievements of the US industry and military, I admit that I admire the resilience and hard work of American people and the well designed industrial and social systems in US, but something that bothers me is the pretentious moral appearances and justifications behind the most cruel and inhumane acts of all history of human kind.

Having said that what was the alternative solution in World War II?

I don’t know.

I think Iranian nation should be very cautious dealing with US. Not to give up their rights but to try to think as the Americans, Iranian common sense is quiet different from American’s.
I think the whole issue is to act rational instead of emotional.

I follow the recent discussions between Hoder and Nikan, as far as it concerns me Nikan is really crazy and nonlinear, and frankly I don’t care what he stands for or he is talking about. But Hoder is a guy with lots of positive and negative attributes who in my regard has an overall positive score. The problem with him is that he has put himself in such a weak position that anybody with any kind of background can effectively accuse him of anything the most people hate.

I hope he gets into some serious business, finish school or get some relevant experience, right now he looks more like a canon without of ammunition.

There is something with arid desertic/mountainous areas that makes you wander, something unique is there. In extreme cold, you play mouse and cat with death, in nice weather with lots of green, you just have fun, a bit superficial, that is life, but in huge dry mountains as well as deserts, there is something that makes you think about mystery of life, no wonder almost all prophets as we knew them are from these kind of geographical areas.
I think the mystery of life has been so huge that the human being could not handle it raw and pure, as it was, there was something in the air, he was so confused by the immensity of the Divine secret that he decided to explain it, or even better justify it, in another words he modeled it into a simple, familiar and understandable system.

Belief
One of the most difficult things for me is to discuss my religious beliefs with a guy who is traditionally religious. I have gone through that difficult experience many times with fellow Muslims, you get to the point that you have to deny certain things or say something which is considered blasphemy and at the same time you don't want to offend or upset people as well, since beliefs are the most irrational and personal part of each individual,
A week ago I went to get a Californian driver's license and I was 1 hour early, there was a talkative guy who was early too, and he started to talk to me and asking questions, he turned out to be a traditional christian believer, I would call him and people like him (Bush) christian Hezbollah. We got to the point that I started to talk about my beliefs and his and, guess what? it was as difficult as if I wanted to talk to a traditional Muslim. At some point I just backed off and nodded yeah, yeah ....
He used to be an alcoholic and drug addict and now he was rehabilitating, and religion was a big help.

Finally my wife and my son joined me yesterday. Danial wanted to go to an outside open pool which we have in the complex we live, I originally thought that the whole big outside pool is warm even during the winter time, not true, the real estate agent did not specify which pool is warmed up all year long, it happened to be the small wading pool for kids, worked for Danial, so full of shame and happy about the fact that nobody was there to see a big hairy guy in the kids wading pool I got in and we had some fun. I am happy about the fact that he and Rosie like the place, I really don’t like the concept of the California, specially what it is in LA and nearby, there are lots of snub and wealthy Iranians around in Orange County, you could say there are lots of rich or quasi-rich middle-easterns around from the number of the Mercedes Benz vehicles circulating.

Big city!
There is a big difference between people of smaller low pace places compared to big out of size cities. I realized the same difference when I was in Iran as well. We moved from Shiraz to Tehran. The first thing you find out is that you should be careful or people would rip you up fast and without hesitation. The same thing is visible here in US, as I was driving through the States, I could see that people in smaller cities are more polite and friendly, unbelievably different from California.
My first bad experience was with a bank teller over the phone, a young girl who had a strong accent (sounded like black people in movies!), when I saw I am not getting anything off the phone I politely ask her If she could talk a bit slower and louder, she did not like that and started to talk even faster, since I was not getting what she was telling me, I repeatedly asked her to say stuff again which she did not like at all, at some point she was so annoyed that when she was confirming my long two part, unfamiliar family name, she said "G as in Garbage", I have had similar experiences in Iran, but never in Canada,
Second one, my wife hired 3 movers over the phone to help me move our stuff down the truc into the apartment. Du to my past experiences with the movers I already knew what kind of people these mover companies are but I had no choice. To make the story short: they screw up and dropped one wooden furniture and damaged it, even though I was covered by he insurance he is not paying for the damage, another negative stuff is that when he knew that the move has went wrong and I am really upset with that, he filed a positive feed back giving himself a 5 star rating (that is another story how he got the login information out of me, a simple country man coming to LA).
third one, I went to the LA customs head office which is close to LA international airport, I was doing the paper work for importing my car from Canada to US, the officer told me to go and have a seat waiting for my documents to get ready, while I was sitting two guys where talking Spanish and I realized they are looking at me. One of them asked me if I have forgotten my wallet at the counter where I submitted my documents, first I said no but then I realized my wallet is not on me and he told me some guy took it and quickly walked away, I ran out and luckily spotted the guy who just got in his truck, I ran to him yelling and before he got away I caught his jacket, since there was a lot of cops around he did not risk it and through out wallet out of window and speeded away. I got my wallet, but if I was 5 seconds late, I could not have it back!
the scary thing is that all these happened in a period of about 10 days, am I going to have more surprises?

At last I am back, after driving 4800km which is about 3000miles. it took me 4 days, a bit longer it could be better if I did not have an accident with the auto transporter. Any ways it is over now and I am going to airport to pick up my wife and my son now.

YouTube Rocks!

That You tube thing is great, I was searching for Fereydoon Foroughi's videos, I watched a few of them and then I noticed there are some political stuff there as well, Shah and Nojeh Coup and the interview with General Rahimi with Dr. Ebrahim Yazdi as the spokesman of the revolutionaries,
I remember all these as a kid, but last night was too sad for me. General Rahimi and General Mohagheghi who was leading the Nojeh coup d'etat, even the guys who where interviewing them after their capture where different from now, very polite and with character's and culture, the guy talking to Rahimi was addressing him as Timsar. I was feeling bad for all of them, the only crap was a Akhond which during the talks with Rahimi, He was jumping in and from the way he was talking you could say he was a akhond.

General Ayat Mohagheghi
General Mehdi Rahimi

And this is Neeyaaz from Fereydoun Froughi:
Fereydoun Froughi

Around August, a very sportive colleague of mine, the kind of people who would do better if born gorilla rather than human, told me that he and a few other friends all from Saskatoon, are going for one of their annual wild all male camping. He asked me if me and Daniel (my son 6 years old) would like to join them. The camping site was in a crown park north of Quebec, a lake with many little tiny islands, We had to walk and portage the canoe and our stuff for about 3 hours and then paddle for another 2 hours to get to one of the available islands. Imagine me a guy who might die if too far from home and afraid of all living things, what should I say? I said yes, just because of Danial who believes Travis is either Superman himself or some sort of god, and that was a big dream of his to go on a camping trip with Travis.
Anyways finally we arrived in one of the rocky islands and set up the camp...
The following day we went for exploring the area and other islands. There was a beautiful scene out there, a very big rock about 15 to 20 meters high so vertical and sharp at the edge of a tiny island. I noticed Travis is paddling that way, I asked what he was cooking and he said he wanted to jump off that cliff, I looked at him and asked if he had lost his mind, "Of course not that is fun!". We got the ca to the shore so he got off and started to climb the cliff, meanwhile me and Danial paddled off the shore below the cliff to see the jump as close as possible. He got edge and then with a wild and excited scream he jumped off, I admit that was great, reminded me of when I was the same age (under 30 years old) and the crazy stuff we used to do.
Danial turned to me, I was still clapping and cheering for Travis' bravery, as soon as I looked into Danial's eyes I knew what he was going to say,
Dad now it is your turn,
I just froze and I did not want to tell him that I was a scardy cat, that I was afraid of jumping off, that I am not a good swimmer and I am 40 years old and ...
His look was begging me to go up and jump,
I got to the shore, and started to climb the cliff, Travis and Danial paddled to the middle to see me jump, I got there, Oh my God, I even could not look down!!
I started to shake and to back off, but Danial started to sing: Go Daddy, Go Daddy,
It was easy to back off because he was so tiny from up there that I could not see his eyes and easy to refuse his will.
But I am a man of my words, a crappy one, but still ...
It took me 10 minutes out there before I knew I was jumping, it felt less than a moment before it was over,
My body jumped while my mind was still struggling, I screamed all way down and so scared that I was looking into water when I touched down,
Danial was crazy and excited, he could not believe his eyes, he showed me Bilakh (thumbs up!) and said he was proud of me,
Travis told me that it was a silent jump! I told him I was screaming all way down, but he said he heard nothing!
Since I got into the water with my face down, my gum got injured and my mouth was bleeding, With the slap I got in the face (from water) I got black eyes as well, But all that was worth, If it was not for that jump, how the hell on earth I could possibly have got Danial to tell me that he was proud of me?

Is Uhaul the worst Moving Truck renting company?

I have been reading all kind of crap about the Uhaul trucks and how shitty they are and how bad Uhaul customer service is.
I am going to drive one of these on a 4700km trip pulling my car behind.
For some reason I don't feel too bad about that, when I read the complaints about Uhaul(they are a lot!) many of those comments are made by ladies and some are talking about stuff that does not make too much sense to me. But there are enough genuine negative feedbacks posted on the internet to give you a chill in the back, anyways next week, middle of the week, I will know what is with Uhaul!

Big Move
Next week, I will be back to Ottawa, We have decided to drive with a Uhaul truck pulling my car behind with an auto transporter. It is more than 4000km driving, 4 to 5 days depending on how good the truck is, the altiltude in Ottawa is around 300ft and I have to go up to 7000ft and come down to almost see level. My colleagus say it is a bit crazy doing that, but I am going for it, wish me luck.

This is a story I have recounted to my son when he has been asking for one before going to sleep.
It is the true story of Tarzan, different from the one made up by Hollywood and Disney.
Long time ago when I was a kid, in Khorramshahr, a city in south of Iran, the very first major city that Saddam captured during Iran-Iraq war, in our neighborhood, Posht-e Gomrok, there was a huge gorilla living with his family. He was the only gorilla in our neighborhood. The rest of his clan where either captured and moved to the zoo or deported to parts of Africa. His name was Zaboor (Disney claims that Zaboor is the name of the leopard which killed the human parents of Tarzan, which is obviously a lie). He had a son which was a human, name Tarzan, Unlike the rest of the neighborhood Tarzan and his family lived on a tree, that made perfect sense given the fact that his dad was a gorilla. Tarzan and I were playmates, I was the fastest and strongest kid in Khorramshahr, unlike me Tarzan was the clumsiest. I was like his bodyguard taking care of him. He was myop and his dad used to shave his hair down to scalp. One favorite thing we loved to do was wrestling. One day we were playing with about 20 other kids and trying to kick butts as much as possible. Zaboor was myop as well and because of his huge gorilla head, he could not find a big pair of glasses to wear. To give Tarzan some credit, I pretend that I was really fighting with him and he was pushing me down to ground (which was totally fake). Zaboor who was up on the tree and was not able to see what was going on, thought humans have attacked and they are taking Tarzan away from him (nobody knew why the hell he was thinking like that in first place!), His gorilla blood started to boil, as a result he could neither see or hear anything, next thing he knew was that he had attacked me and other 20 kids to save Tarzan, the result of this stupid and unnecessary intervention was 42 broken hands, 40 broken legs and 21 bruised eyes. My dad who was home and heard me screaming (the first and last time in my life, I swear to God!) knew right away that something was wrong, he came out and stopped Zaboor, he tied him down and called the cops. First he wanted to let Zaboor and his family to stay in Khorramshahr, since all the fuss was a stupid misunderstanding, but then he convinced Zaboor to leave for Africa fear of stupid humans trying to retaliate. Zaboor and his family left for Africa. In the same ship they were on, there was an American reporter (Christian Amanpoor from CNN) who heard their story and promised him to help and let everybody else know the truth about him and his difficult life. Something that never happened.
You know the rest of it.

Home Alone!
I had to move to the new place before my wife and son, now I am here without family and it is not so fun. I always thought if I got alone for a while I would do lots of stuff that usually when I am with family I don't do and I nag about it on a daily basis.
Now I am alone and my life so boring that ...
I am so used to them that sometimes I feel I even don't exist without my family. I know when we get together again I will start nagging about the hardship and restrictions of family life but that is bullshit.
I like Koroush Aliani, there is no specific reason, but the texts he writes are nice, they are different, I don't know him and I don't know how he is in his personal life, but his writings are something I like,
Lately he is writing a bit weird, Is he alright? I hope so.
I like Kameran's writings from Israel as well. He is so Iranian,
Beside these guys I like Hoder's blog as well with all his ups and downs and his opinions, he is not fake, that is great. He needs to get his ass together and do something serious, go in hiding finish his school and come back, what he is doing is like working in a fast food store, you can't do it for good.

His recent talks and the negative reactions of some people reminds me of a personal experience with a member of my own family. I came to Canada as an immigrant, that is, as a professional engineer I applied for immigration to Canada and that was with my own money. I came over here and since I could not find a suitable job I ended up doing my masters degree for better career opportunities afterwards. Anyways, one day I was talking politics with this guy who had become family after my sister married his brother in Law. It was the first time Khatami was around and the first time after so many years there was a real hope in him and what he was talking about. It was the second time in my whole life that I was going to vote, and I talked about that openly and talked about the hope and that this time it was different (was it?). After a while my sister told me that now that guy is referring to you as the Hezbollah and the agent of the Islamic republic in Canada and how these agents come to study in Canada and so forth.
That is sad, anybody might or might not be the agent of any intelligence agency, but for god's sake if he is, is he so stupid to show it up?
We enjoy calling people names and by labeling people we make our life a hell easier and fun, others' life a hell harder, who cares HAH?!!!.

I have moved to a warmer place, I really had got used to Ottawa and people, the only thing was the winter, my wife and chili winter are just like the middle east crisis, that is why I moved.
They will join me in a while, a month or so, I have got an apartment and a job, sounds enough.

Bush is an asshole!
Ahmadi nejad is an asshole!

They are pushing Iran to the point that you feel you like to say: Everybody go to hell, shut up and we will do what ever is appropriate for us,
I think all the pressure in the nuclear issue is the result of the stupid behavior and general neglect of Ahmadi Nejad, I wonder when he starts to think about diplonacy and benefits of that,

I have been in a constant state of forgetfulness for sometime, forgetting about all the good that god has given me. My boys, my wife,
I should never have forgotten the pain of losing them,
Thank you God,

I am still thinking about derivation of a formula to calculate the population of the assholes in a given nation using the official statistics published by the government.
... Meanwhile, most of the politicians are assholes, genuine assholes, I don't believe anybody (Specially bastards, I mean American politicians) based on what they say, but what they do and what is the outcome of their actions, like Iranian politicians (they are not as hypocrite though!), the most honest ones are Israelis who openly say fuck Palestine and they do so.
Americans, Do they care about democracy in Middle East? Bullshit, by far they have been supporting the most undemocratic tyrannies in Middle East and directly they have been engaged in the most undemocratic behavior a country can by invading Iraq. What they have achieved? is anybody stupid enough to say they did not know the consequence?What counts is the US national interest before anything else, if necessary they can drop atomic bombs and kill more than 200000 people in a blink of eye, and no shame!! That is fucking unbelievable!!!

I want to talk about the Assholes. My motivation? A program on BBC world channel about the hypothetical new borders of Palestine with Israel, the reporter was walking around and asking Israeli people about how the new official Israeli Palestine border should look like, with the map and a marker to draw the new frontier, I don't want to talk about all the suggestions but just to say that the best one (in Palestinians favor) was in TelAviv when a few young people reconfirmed the present official border line plus the settlements in occupied territories. The Asshole, the one that inspired me to write this post, he drew a careless border line way over the official border line into the Jordan, Egypt, Syria and Lebanon, of course with no Palestinian state.
How many Assholes are there per nation, I know they are everywhere, we have bunch of them right in Iran, USA and even in Canada.
I am making up a theory to find out the percentile of assholes in different nations.

At the bottom of my heart I really badly want to kick the Americans' butts. You know it is a desire, it is something that would make me a bit relieved because of all their interventionist behaviors, but it is not the solution to anything. The problem is that why should any asshole like America be able to piss us off? Why during the contemporary history we have been manipulated so easy? Instead of working on our historical weaknesses we started to point at people and accusing them of being the root cause which is completely wrong, USA is not the cause of all the misfortunes we are dealing with, they are taking advantage of it, they are riding the wave, they don't create it. I am not saying they can't or they have not conspired at all, they have but in smaller scales. Our case, the Iranian case is different. We have to have a look at ourselves, why an asshole like USA should be able to piss us off at all?
We are not working wisely, we don't have democracy, we don't have any respect for our national interests, unlike Americans our national interests come after bunch of other unattainable and virtual stuff that in long run just destroy our limited resources and own people, we don't have any long term plan, we don't know who can be a friend (I am talking about Arab countries that are bunch of cowards not worth to be trusted at all).
Behaving emotional rather than rational is what has made our politics so destructive and dysfunctional.

This is a difficult time; there will be lots of difficulties for Iranian people. The current nuclear crisis running between Iran and USA could be avoided somehow if the Iranian side was a little bit smarter, thinking a bit more like living on earth rather than in the sky. Fundamentally USA or any other country has no right to impose any kind of nuclear behavior on Iran as long as Iran is abiding to the international protocols and agreements. Iran could be a bit smarter in order to delay or even avoid any irrational international reaction initiated and promoted by USA. I think Ahmadi Nejad did a great job on behalf of USA and Israel. For me the international laws or protocols are all jokes, to find out who has the right for access to nuclear power is as simple as the following:
If you already have nuclear capabilities (military or civil) then having nuclear capabilities is your right, if you don't possess such technology yet it is not your right.

As a result of stupid people governing Iran and their very smart and experienced opponents, we end up loosing more of our sovereignty. What is the difference between Ahmadi Nejad and Ghajariyeh losers? We lost part of Iran at that time and now the whole Iran is on stake!
I like to call Ahmadi Nejad the big FART, He is so annoying.

Yesterday most of the morning at work I was daydreaming about going back to school and pursue the career of teaching. Unbelievable, I was so happy, my colleague was asking me which drug I was on. It was so good, I am getting tired of this dead line driven unfriendly work environment, I wish I could go back to school, just this crap life style with all the expenses and...
for now I keep on dreaming.

I was watching a documentary called "The end of Suburbia". It was about the dependency of the american life style on oil. Warning that before too long we will see the oil reserves depleted and then dramatically we won't be able to live the way we do now. What the film makers are forecasting for that time is war for oil. Actually they are saying that with the war in Iraq The long lasting "war for oil" has already started.

Procrastination,
I just found out that there is a very serious research field in psychology dealing with that. The interesting part of an article I was reading about procrastination was that if it has an internal cause, that is difficult to get rid of. Fear of success and failiur are among the internal causes for procrastinating or avoiding a particular task. We are complicated animals,

It is a very sad situation in Iraq. How emotional they are. How emotional we are. I think one of the most sacred things is human life, no abstraction, real and touchable. The reactions are just not right, I am not saying "who cares what happened to the shrine" if people think that "The Shrine" is sacred so it is sacred, but the reactions are just off the scale, brother kills brother. We blame Israelis and Americans killing Moslems! Nonsense.
I don't know, It is sad.

In our society and culture the nation has lots of attention and respect but the individuals are not as respected and attentioned. Who cares if individuals are in trouble or danger on a daily basis by their own government or compatriots? But if a foreign identity says something against any icon related to "Iran", that is blasphemy, this is in the culture, no good.

This is a bit political, I am a bit pissed off by the recent noises and religious back and forth going on between Europe and Moslems in general. Something so general that there is no fucking way you can say as a Moslem (even a non practicing one like me) that you don't care, something well done to put all Moslems from any political and sectarian background in the same row,
Why do they do that? It reminds me of the kind of psychological tortures that has been designed and performed on male Moslem inmates since a long time in Israel and recently in Abou Gharib in Iraq and Guantanamo bay. I don't believe discussion between civilizations is a genuine thing, this is just a hopeful wish, what is true and is happening right now is the clash between civilizations. That is how it works, how it has been and how it will be. These guys are rushing in to it, they know Moslems are in no good shape right now, that is the best time, the respect and all the other shit is just good to talk about in books, whose fault is that? It is all our fault. I don't blame any American or western country for any of that, we are an easy target, so vulnerable and fragile that even a baby can make us dance.
we did not take life as serious as we should, now we pay for that,

I am a bit messed up. Too busy at work and the same at home. My mood has been going up and down like a yoyo, anyways.
I read frequently the hoder's weblog, for his posts and people's comments. He has gone to Israel for a visit. As he calims to conduct a dialog between civilizations. Looking at him and what he has done in past few years I would give him a positive credit. I am not sure about his personal intentions (I am not him!) but overall the outcome has been constructive.
At least he is doing something,

Look at the moon, not the clouds

When I read about depression and its symptoms in people, I am amazed how they are applicable to nations (as a whole, beyond individuals) as well. In that sense coulsd you call a nation or society depressed? if yes middle eastern societies, in general, are good examples for depression at national level.
Can a society be manic-depressive? Or schizophrenic?

There are principal flaws in the Shia belief which is totally against what Islam was or claimed to offer initially. One thing that is stressed a lot in Qur'an is monotheism and the uniqueness of God and that he has created the world alongside with the rules to govern it. Superstition has been attacked from the first days of Islam and that ideology gave the new Moslems' minds the courage to get free from chaos and go to discover those rules. Now after so many years we are defying those early principles and the chaos is back in our minds and lives.
I am talking about Emam_e_Zamaan and Tavassol.

If we, the moslems could take the pain of believing that God is not there to take care of us, nothing is going to change or to be different for us, and if you don't take care of yourself and your people nobody including God will.

I am approaching forty. I feel I am getting into the famous mid life crisis. This is somehow difficult to manage these days, you should take care of the work and the family, you don't want your kids pay for your hesitation, no time to think about existential questions and no solitude, Which is alright, that is my choice. The worse thing is the feeling that you do not know exactly who you are and you are not understanding and doing things properly especially concerning the belief, values and ethics.

Is God Fair?

I am really oscillating between belief and disbelief. The image of god the way which is explained in Abrahamic religions has some contradictions in it. He is all powerful and able to do anything and he is fair. At the same time under his command the most unfair things are happening. There are two possibilities for me, the first one is that God is not fair, or fairness should be redefined.
If I am capable of preventing innocent people from suffering , but I don't then I am not fair, at least in human standards.

I don't believe in the good nature of the human being. I think we are animals, like many other animals that if not instructed will operate exclusively under the influence of our instincts. The difference, I mean the big difference is in our intelligence.
Look at the small kids and toddlers, how selfish and cruel they are (with smaller ones or weaker) and if there is no do and don't from the parent they won't realize the good from the bad (the human values ) by themselves. Conclusion: the human values and what we know as humanity is the product of the human mind and intelligence, a system of values is a must for social life, otherwise we never could come to have a collective life in a big society.

I am reaching to a painful and disturbing conclusion concerning God and religion. There is no solid proof (the kind of proof we like and we are used to in science and our everyday life) for the existence of God. I have rased and told as if such thing exists and that God as defined in Abrahamic religions is such an obvious concept. No doubt, there are signs of him being there but they are signs mostly backed up by our biased common sense.
I would not even listen to anybody who claims to offer any solid proof about existence of God.
Does it really matter? Isn't that the same thing as Molavi said: the people of reason (philosophers and scientists) got wooden feet?
Believing in God and rest of it is a very personal matter (I don't like widely encouraged concept of collective activities in religion which avoids the "wandering about" and "Doubt") , a matter of heart and not reason.
In that case what religeons are all about?

Ahmadi nejad does not deserve the position he is holding. He is dealing and talking to international community the same way he would and is resolving national issues. He is making a very easy military target out of Iran. If he continues to behave irresponsibly (as a president) I don't think after a while any foreign country specially Isreal would need any strong justification for any preemptive strike against Iranian targets. Actually Ahmadi Nejad is ruining very quickly what khatami had done in 8 years.
May be Ahmadi nejad is what is needed at national level for people and the moderate elite to find out a way out of this mess just for the sake of Iran and the nation.

The whole concept of the necessity of the existence of the religious elites to make people understand the Quran is a fallacious one. That was true when the majority of the people could not read but now considering that most of the people can read we do not really need those guys in their traditional forms. Good translators and literature experts are needed more a million times. In Quran at the end of the Sura of Smoke (Ad Dokhan) it is explicitly affirmed that Quran has been created simple for people to understand (in arabic though) so that people can use it. If clergies have been using Quran for their own purpose by interpreting the clear messages into not really clear populist propaganda is again related to the unavailability of a nice simple translation that people can use. For me the language is the most important barrier not the clarity of the messages.

I was talking to a friend of mine about how I am thinking about life and specially about God and religion. The comments which are made concerning the people's beliefs should be very careful. First of all my friend is a strong believer in Moslem beliefs as a whole and in Shia teachings in particular second this matters are not part of his preoccupations at all. I had a hard time to get out of the discussion that I started myself and that finally was possible just by admitting that I was wrong and mislead by reading just the literal translations of the religious texts in general without the proper interpretation.
Shia teaching for me is more of a political movement rather than a religious one. Shia doctrine is heavily loaded with political biases which consequently shapes the shia traditions and practices, which I think is practical. For me it is using religion for a political purpose, even a national one.

I have got three english translations of Qur'an. This is a shame that we don't have a popular farsi translation that you can take and read like any other book. The translations are either ugly or full of gramatically mixed up sentences. You would say whoever did these tranlations did not know enough either farsi or arabic.
The oxford calssic collection is the best one to read like a book but not for making refferences. The only problem with it is that the name of the sura is there only in english.

Prophethood?

I believe prophethood is a spiritual move starting from humans. Prophets are smart and thoughtful beings who started the move toward the meaning. Unlike the traditional believes, I believe the messengers of God picked up the torch by their own initiative and their conviction of the status quo being awfully wrong. I don't believe God chose any of his messengers. The difference between the successful and not successful religions goes back to how smart has been the corresponding prophet and how deep has been his spiritual experience.

Happy Ramazan
This is the beginning of Ramazan. I don't fast and I don't believe in God the way the majority of Moslems do. But from bottom of my heart I envy them. I miss the days that (not so long ago!) I thought there is a purpose for whatever happens. I still believe there is a God out there but I admit I know nothing about him.

?? ??? ?? ??? ?????? ????
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??? ???? ???? ?? ????? ????

It is a long time now since my last post. Well I don't have had enough motivation to write anything. I have gone through a mental storm, I don't know what I believe in any more. On the other hand I am not reading good news about Iran at all. Not so encouraging!
Anyways I hope I can write something, that helps me.

I lost my son. Ryan passed away 4 months ago. Without any warning, no sign, no illness, no nothing. In a beutiful day of august, when Rosie took him and his brother for a bath, he just fainted and that was it.
It just happened when we thought everything was going to be alright, it was 3 months that I was at my new job and they were just back from a pleasant 3 months visit to Iran.
Once, when they were in Iran, I told a colleague that I could not remember Ryan's face and I was scared, I took a few of his picture and put it just in front of me at work. We miss him so much, I am patient, one day we will join him, that is the silver lining.

Long time no see

that is right it is a very long time that I have not written anything. First reason is that I had nothing to talk about ( I guess) and another reason possibly is that I am so badly entangled in everyday life that the blogging is not a concern anymore. I hoped to develop the habit of elogging and finally interhalize that, but too busy I guess.

Shirin Ebadi

I think people expect to much from Ebadi. Everybody is saying that she should do this or that but nobody is considering the actual limitations and obstacles she faces. After all she is going back to Iran and if she wants to do something real instead of complaining and nagging (just like many of us living abroad) she has to be pragmatist. I think the very fact that she has openly participated the ceremonies without Hejab is by itself a big achievement and a huge step forward. Just watch for the price she should pay for her move.

My Son and Mini Me

Last night we were invited to my bosses house for Christmas party. Lots of kids were around and it was the good part for My 4 year old son. The funny thing was that it ended to be a freedom night for kids. My boss who does not really care about the age ratings of the movies just went on by showing samples of available movies and cartoon to kids ( from 2 up to 12 year old) and at the end he had chosen a bunch to show in sequence. The most successful movie was the "Gold Member" and then the second most popular one was "who framed Roger rabbit". Now my son is asking to shave his hair and be the "Mini Me" and asking me to shave my hair as well, to look like Dr. Evil. I don't know if it has been a good idea to let the kids watch rated movies but it looks like that the kids pick up the parts which are interesting to them ( I am not obviously talking about XXX rated!!!), what I mean is that they actually filter out the unpleasant parts to their taste.

Barbari

It is more than one year now that I am baking Barbari. Thanks to fresh bread we are eating some breakfast. Every weekend I prepare enough dough to bake 7 to eight breads or pizzas. I have just started to bake Baguette, it is eatable but not commercial yet.
I have tried to bake Sangak too, no easy task.
I love bread.

Where is Bilakh ( the equivalent of giving somebody the finger in Iran) coming from?

One of my British colleagues sent out this email regarding the origins of giving the middle finger in west, read it.

Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers. Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow and therefore they would be incapable of fighting in the future. This famous weapon was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as “plucking the yew” (or “pluck yew”).
Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, “See, we can still pluck yew! PLUCK YEW!”
Since ‘pluck yew’ is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodental fricative 'F', and thus the words often used in conjunction with the one-finger-salute!
It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic gesture is known as “giving the bird.

I replied the email and explained how in Iran the thumbs up is conceived the same as middle finger in west but I had no story for it.
Now I am thinking where our Bilakh is coming from, I guess it has something to do with the secound world war and the invasion of Iran by American and British troops. I read something about Bruce Willis travelling to Iraq and his comments about how well he had been welcomed by Iraqi people who had shown him lots of thumbs up. I don't know if in Iraq holding thumbs up is the same as in Iran?

Think twice before giving advice

My older son Danial has started to draw naked people since a couple of months ago. He found out that it was fun and rewarding too. I think I just gave him some hint to a very interesting thing to do when I told him it was not good to draw people naked and specially to draw men's penis or women's breast. He drew his own conclusion out of my comments, If he wants to impress people and get some extra attention he just should draw them nude with their stuff hanging out . Actually it is working for him. A couple of days ago I took him to work with me and he really impressed everyone by drawing a very good looking breast on our big whiteboard. He is going to be 4 years old in February.

How to fight terrorism

In my opinion the most important reason that US government in particular and the western countries in general (in a lower extent of course) have not succeeded to contain terrorism is the kind of approach they traditionally have chosen to deal with the problem and problem makers. What I mean is that they ignore the human nature of these guys and the societies they are coming from and by demonizing these guys they choose the iron feast policy which is not going to work just because we are dealing with people not machines or animals. The fist and the important thing is to put yourself in their place and see what would you do in a similar situation and then deal with it wisely. US officials look at the international terrorism as a runaway process which has to be killed ( as a matter of fact that is the case!!) without doing anything about the operating system. I believe that the long history of unfair and unilateral US policy and mechanical reactions in middle east is the source of all these problems. A sick operating system is the source of the frequent runaway processes and if they do nothing about the system just killing the unwanted process won't resolve andthing in longterm. By acting violently and not wisely, US is encouraging and incubating an upsurge of the next generation of violent actions through an idealogic and consistent type of terrorsism .
US officials have to understand that they should seek an answer to resolve a very important and vital issue which is engraved in the middle eastern's minds and hearts instead of trying to erase and ignore the problem and the human nature of it.

Superficial American fellows

Sometime ago I was looking in goggle for Iran e Ashofteh to see if there is any trace of my new URL at blogspot. I headed to the site called "blogs of war" in which people apparantly talk about the US and war ( I think it was created after the Iraq war). Some friendly, democracy lover american guy had copied and pasted one of my postings and then guess the rest.
These American fellows are badly superficial and aggressive. It is only talk and talk, it is like there is a debate going on instead of a discussion or something. It is like their setup is done to kick somebody's ass and that is the achievement.
They are badly ignorant of their image outside of the US and their crazy inflated patriotism prevents them from seeing the reality. The basic core of the US foreign policy is " the purpose justifies the means" whatever the means are. It is like these friendly human rights lover and democracy exporters have forgotten what they did to Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Frankly I don't see why they would not do such a thing again ( Say they have not done it already!).
When I imagine that if it was not because of the CIA sponsored Coup d'etat in Iran which resulted in overthrowing the liberal government of Mossadeq, it was for 60 years now that we have been practicing democracy in Iran. Just imagine that. Is it conspiracy theory if I think US is not looking for democracy rather than their national interests? (don't forget that the purpose badly justifies the means)

I am back again

I try to write again. Things look much better now.

let's go

Not accessible?

My computer is officially dead!!

I think this month I have not been so lucky. A surge from hell just wrecked my computer's mother board, and because it is a discontinued Pentume3 I should replace the memory and processor too. Something that I can't afford now. I had to disconnect my High speed Internet service too. Anyways I am using the blogspot free space and that is it.

I was very sad after hearing Laleh and Ladan's death news. I don't know about you but their birth was a big deal to me. I was six and seeing a twin like that was something extraordinary for me. Imagine yourself at their place, I believe they have accomplished what they wanted. They went into the surgery with a great hope to get separated and for them the time has stopped there. I mean they have not witnessed the failure. They have won their gamble. I am sure they would enjoy their life a lot if they had made it, but as far as the operation and this huge single event is concerned, because they have done that operation by hope and not as an act of desperation they have won.
God bless them.

Forth aniverssary of student unrest

Tommorow is the forth anniversary of the student's appraisal in Iran. I have a very mixed feeling about these violent events. From one hand I remember what kind of nonsense and rude creatures are these Hezbollah conservatives and kicking their ass sounds great and on the other hand I badly believe that violence is going to help them to advance their agenda the most. Violence is their mother tongue. They know nothing else and they want to drag people into this trap. With the momentum that the democratic movement and the need for change is getting I am sure in a couple of years there is no place no where in Iran for any of these guys, Hezbollah or Mojahed or any other kind of violence. Patience and reason is what should reign in our political culture now.
After all, all these problems, in my opinion , have cultural origins and to overcome those deficiencies is a long reform process. Just remember what we did during the revolution. We replaced a Tyranny with something worse. A nation does not change overnight, we need time to practice democracy and rule of law.

Political maturity

I read this from BBC Persian site. Safar Morad Niazev the Turkmenistan’s president (self chosen life time) has announced that in the capital (Eshgh Abad which means city of love) except for cats, dogs and ornamental birds keeping any kind of domestic animal is going to be banned. The reason is that they stink and they don't let the nice smell of a flower which recently has been renamed after the president to be felt. The same president has changed the name of months of the year to something inspired from his mom and I am not kidding.
You want to know how mature are a political system and nation, just look at what the political leaders say and do. By the way I am not excluding Iran.

US and IRAN

I just read a comment from Colin Powel saying that US should not infer in Iranian internal affairs and Americans should not forget that Iranian president has been elected freely. On the other hand Rumsfeld is playing another tune. The same business with reformists and conservatives in Iranian politics?
It is a matter of time. If all foreign powers specially US could stop war mongering and inferring in Iranian affairs ( something that Iranians are culturally very sensitive to) people are going to straight their account with conservative fellows, hopefully in a peaceful way.

Carlos the Jackal has converted to Islam!!

By what we are getting these days, world is getting convinced that Islam and Islamic teachings are violent and violence is intrinsic in that religion. I was stunned when I read this about Carlos the international terrorist and that he has converted to Islam and praised Bin Laden for what he has done.

What I want to say is that as a Moslem and Iranian I don't think that way and I believe the very first victims of such acts and violent actions are Moslems themselves. As a matter of fact we will see how Bin Laden has betrayed Moslem nations by giving such a dark and violent image from Islam and middle eastern cultures. The other dangerous thing is the very violent superficial impressions that superficial people get from what Bin Laden has done. He has not done anything good for his people, he has just collaborated in an act of destruction with other violent guys like George Bush, the same way as Saddam did. It has much more to do with politics than religion, Islam is only a pretext. They would do the same thing if they were born Christian, Jew or anything else.

Human life is chip?

In eastern cultures we have lots of comments and sayings about the human's dignity and rights. But in practice we frequently abuse those rights and don't react promptly to human loss and sufferings.
I read something on BBC that the Chinese police had arrested a lady without letting her to arrange for care of her three year old kid during her absence. After 2 weeks the poor kid dies from starvation.
Iran, China and India are countries with a very old culture. We have a rich cultural heritage and at the same time serious deep problems. Just like an old guy. I think as a result of a long existence of social and collective institutions, the individual rights do not have enough weight in these cultures. The tradition and society and collective rights overshadow the individual human right and life.

Having said that I should say the new cultures mostly in north America have their own good and bad things too. New and strong like a young guy without a mature and deep understanding.

Posting again!
Iranian identity

When my son was born I sent a few Iranian names to my colleagues and asked them for their feedback. I was looking for an Iranian name which had an English equivalent or was easy to pronounce in English. One of the guys who is British ( normally the Europeans are much more politically educated and cultivated than north Americans) got back to me with the name Saddam. Of course he was kidding, he told me as a matter of fact Saddam is now a well known name in west and the guy himself is a hero back there. I asked back where? He said in Iran. I said no way, Saddam was no hero in Iran and he'd better go to hell.
He said he had seen many reports coming from Moslem countries showing demonstrations and interviews in favor of Saddam and he thought Iran should not be an exception.
The most difficult thing to explain here is that Iran has a distinct and different identity from most of the Moslem countries. It is difficult to explain this difference, because it exists and does not exist at the same time. In Middle East the most important thing we have in common is the religion: we are Moslem. At the same time the most different aspect is religion: Iranians are Shia ( other Moslem countries are mostly Sonni) and they have experienced an Islamic revolutionary government for about 25 years now which is almost unique in the region. The Majority of Iranians does not look at Islam the way other Moslem countries do. We have seen how cruel a government can get by applying the absolute religious ethics and values directly to people's everyday life. which is very much relative in nature. We feel it very urgent and strong why a government should be nonreligous why democratic institutions are necessary rather than more Islamic ones.
Besides all these religion based factors, the Iranian culture plays an important role in our overall Identity. The same thing is true for the other side of the line too. Not long time ago the other Moslem countries under the Arab Nationalist and Iraqi flag fought Iran. Being an Arab or an Iranian is not the same thing , we are just coming from two different backgrounds.

Hassani

This is a real discourse from Hassani ( Oroumiyeh Friday preacher).
One day he was talking about the revolution and the moral and positive influence of the Islamic revolution on society and he said:
Revolution has given everything to us, it has change our moral and even our people, for example these dear brothers and sisters who attend the Friday prayers today are the very same prostitutes and guys who picked them up during the Shah regime.

He preaches both in Azari ( Tokish) and Fasri. One they he stopped talking Azari and started to talk Farsi and he said:
I am going to say this part in Farsi so that Clinton ( Clinton was the US president at that time) is going to understand too.

We badly freaked out yesterday!

I was working in the back yard when my wife came out with our baby in her arms and asked me if Danial my other son is with me. He was not with me and I told her that he wasn't. She was badly shocked and very shaky told me that he was not at home either. Danial is 3 years and 5 months old and recently has learned how to unlock the door at the entrance. I just did not know what I was going to do, I was frozen. After some time I started to running around in the neighborhood and searching in the streets and backyards. After 10 minutes I came back and tired and desperate I was going to call the police but I saw my wife who had found him in the garage playing in the dark and very hot. It was one of the worst experiences we have ever had concerning Danial. Specially with these latest news about the kidnapping and murder of a small girl in Toronto we really freaked out.

New Emam Jom e (Friday Prayers preacher) for Tehran

I read this report of Hassani's speach (Hassani is preacher of Oroumiyeh) about the recent violent protests in Tehran and instantly I got an excellent Idea to bring more people to the friday prayers in Tehran. I suggest Hassani to be the preacher of Tehran's friday prayer. This is going to help both people by having more joy and fun in life and the autorities by showing off more people during the prayers.

even more: for phase two they can introduce him as the Replacement Emam e Jome for all cities in Iran so that everybody can share happiness with Oroumiyeh. Just imagine how many people would like to go and attend and listen to these "Khozabalaat" or "friday stand up comedy" live by Hassani.

Read this article from Mr. Behnoud

I just read this article from mr. Behnoud. For people who are in Iran it may sound alright, but here I can feel this awful feeling. When my Canadian friends and colleagues ask about violence and Eslam and Iran I have nothing to say about that. Whatever you say to justify and explain what is happening in Iran, they are seeing the contrary on TV and in News. Look at the events during the revolution, the Iran Iraq war, the Conservatives and Hezbollah and Mojahedeen and so on. We are going to transform into a nation with a culture of violence. No matter how much you talk about the great Iranian cultural heritage it is in vain, international community is witnessing something else.

Iranian Governement should give general amnesty to the simple members of Mojahedeen. I am sure Great Iranian nation can pardon its very own children who once betrayed Iran. I saw a picture of some of these guys in Iraq and I felt pity for these guys who look so old and broken now. They are victims of Rajavi's organization and their own hatred. It is time for pardon and cool.

Long live Iran, Long live great Iranian Nation

Conspiracy Theory


I read an article from Mr. Behnoud. There was a mention of somebody who had commented that Americans would attack Iran if Iranians push to the end. But I don't think this attack is going to happen at all. I know I may sound like Daei Jaan Napoleon but I believe Iranian conservatives and Americans are cooperating to keep Iran as weak as possible. What I am seeing is a complete coordination among these two sides, they offer each other the required pretexts to undermine and put more pressure on Iranian people. Why should Americans want to topple Iranian regime? Why they don't do any thing against Saudi Arabia or Jordan or Egypt or...? Dictatorship is good and they like it, if they buy the dictator ( which experience has shown it to be possible) they own the country. The reason for which they are interested in Iran is that Iran is showing some kind of democratic behavior and Americans want to make sure that democracy is not going to happen here.

All my life I have been making fun of the people who use conspiracy theory to resolve all the issues. Now I am getting to believe in such a conspiracy in Iranian affairs. I can't believe that the American and Iranian conservatives have common interests just by accident.

If one day Americans attack Iran it will be just because we may have got too close to be a democratic and strong nation . Until then there is no rush for a military option because they are just doing well alonside with fellow Iranian conservatives in stopping the democratic process in Iran.

Too much Politics!?

The first time I decided to write in my web log it was not intended to be only political. When I look at the writings now, I see the majority of the postings are political. This is against my willing but it shows how much sensitive we are toward Iran's affairs even though we are not living in Iran.
I am going to try to write about other subjects too. It is good for me to turn to different stuff reserving some mental energy.

Act of terrorism or what?

I can not stop thinking to guys who burned themselves for objecting to the arrest of Maryam Rajavi and some other Mojaheds in France.
Burning oneself is not in my list of possible ways of protesting against something. My first impression is that this idea ( lets burn ourselves in objection to ...) is an organizational decision. I mean some guys have come up with this brilliant idea in Mojahedeen's higher hierarchy and then it has circulated among the members. Then like any other organization (even sadaam Hossein had his own Fadaee ) there are some obedient and loyal members who volunteer for anything prescribed and encouraged from higher levels of hierarchy. You remember the first Iraq's suicide bomber was an army officer, in another one two women were involved, one of them was pregnant. I can't see how an Iraqi army officer or a pregnant woman can volunteer for a suicide mission.

Another thing that suggests these burnings are the result of an organizational move rather than personal frustration is that there are more people burning themselves in each protest. If you look at the people that are burning you will see that they are mature and middle aged guys that usually their actions are expected to be rational rather than emotional. What I mean is that some devoted hard core members have executed this new organization's tactic to attract world's attention and that is not the result of personal despair at all. This is the same thing as suicide bombing. The violent act is a violent act either you apply it to your self or somebody else. This is scary because it is not personal, this comes from top. These guys burned themselves ( and their fellow Mojahed brother and sisters watched and hailed them burning), they could burn anybody else, it all depends on the orders and their leaders.
This is an act of terrorism, are'nt you terrorized looking at those Mojaheds burning in flames? Do you think people who set themselves on fire burn differently from other people being set on fire by somebody else? that scary act and result is there, the mentality is the same.

If there is going to be a judgment day I am sure many Iranian political figures are going to be in trouble, including the Rajavi family and Khomeini who should pay for all lives lost and all the human sufferings resulting from their lifetime achievements.

Self burning

I saw some very disturbing images of a few Mojahed people burning themselves. I was sick in the stomac. I could not believe that. I could not see why these guys do that. The most strange thing was that they are not young people. What kind of impression do they want really to give to world. I am so afraid of these guys, anybody who can do such a thing to himself won't show pity for somebody else.

I read a good article from Majid Mohamadi about khatami and Mojahedeen. I am critical of both sides but as he has nicely said there are some principles which should be applied to any human being.

Ebraim Nabavi has written a very nice letter to Khameneii

What should we do?

I read in the news that some of the Iranian intellectuals have signed and sent a letter to UN. One of the guys who has signed this letter is Ebrahim Nabavi. I read his interview about this letter and his motives to sign that. He was talking about the necessity of the involvement of the international community in Iranian issues. Like applying more sanctions and so on. I am not convinced if it is going to work that way. More sanctions is going to put more pressure on people. At the end government does not care about the resolutions and is going to buy the needed stuff from black market and the people are going to pay for that.

I really don't know what is the best thing to do, but I've got the feeling that the reactions of the international comunity( In particular the west) is very much dependent on their economical concerns and interests. On the other hand UN has just shown to lack enough autority dealing with much more important issues, so what should we expect from UN?

I don't see anyone else other than Iranian people being able and rightful to cleanup the mess.

They sold Iranians to Saddam for nothing!

The most detested and disgusting political parties and groups in Iran are those who have betrayed their nation and have sold their people's dignity and pride for nothing. I am talking about the Mojahedeen e khalgh in particular. Even now I can't see how an Iranian can refuge to saddam's haven, the sworn enemy of Iranian people to fight for an allegedly Iranian cause.
For the simple members who have been in Iraq under strict military and organizational protocols I would show some understanding for the low level of the information and political insight. But I don't understand what is wrong with the outside supporters in the west? Is it realy that hard to see and understand the obvious facts and the very basic moral principles? I don't know. But I wish the violent movements in Iran will stop sometime and people get enough experience in life to know who is a friend and what treason and loyalty mean.

At the end I will be very happy to see them gone, as happy as seeing Ansar e Hezbollah and all other violent groups out of Iranian politics.

Violence can destroy us

Iranians does not afford another period of violence. Let's get cool and think, instead of blowing up everything.
I am seeing more people thinking that USA's meddling in Iran's affairs is damaging the reform movement. Some may believe that it is because of the lack of the information or experience of American administration about Iran and its political and cultural nature, but I believe strongly that Americans know exactly what they are doing.

Patience and reason

If we could be more patient and rational!
Sometimes I think because of the lack of leadership in reform camp the drive for democracy in Iran which is the youth's demands and presence could stop the reformist and democratic process. I am sure in a couple of years official reformers will be able to draw a line between their religeous beliefes and governing concepts. I think most of the Iranian people have already made that distinction and in that sense these politicians are lagging behind.

Just beautifully said

I just read this report about Dr. Soroush's speach in England. It makes lots of sense to me. Could you believe this system being capable of committing all kind of cruelty (I realy mean all kind ) in the name of god and religion? Mohsen Kadivar had recently compared the Islamic republic's judiciary system with the judiciary system of Pahlavi era, he had said that Pahlavi regime's judges (civil courts)were much more honest and knowledgable than these now clergy judges.

Read this article

Read this article from Gooya news. This is from Majid Mohammadi. I think he has done a very good analysis of these violent protests in Tehran. People should not play the hardliner's game ( any hardliner, right or left ) who are master of violence.

I am confused

I am getting nervouse about these riots and fights in Tehran. The conservatives may want to get rid of reform demands once for all. They would let the protests to grow to a size which is big enough for propaganda and at the same time small enough for them to smash. Like what happend at Khordad 1360 with the stupid move from Mojahedin. I don't think violence and violent moves are going to solve any problem. on the other hand feeling hopeless and helpless is a drive for youth's anarchist behavior.

Sepah ( revolutionary guards) has been dangerously quiet about these protests?
From news I have read that Police is doing a good job to separate two sides of conflict?

USA please Shut up!

I wish US administration would shut the hell up for a while. They are providing pretext and evidence to conservative public propaganda machine against the people's peacefull reform mouvement in Iran.

Next move is coming from fellow Iranian hardliners, just watch the nice harmony.

United conservative front ( Iran and US) against Iranian People

Just read Khameneii's speach about the riots in Tehran. Don't you think this guy is getting fresh official updates from fellow Americans? I can't imagine other than a very high level coordination between two conservative governments which brings about such an excellent syncronization and leads them to their common goal. Believe it or not these guys are helping each other magnificently. Is it by accident that whatever stances both governments take ends up in putting Iranian people under more pressure ?
The funny part of this so called leader's speach is where he says that USA is talking frankly about the methods they are going to use against Iranian regime. From when do you think USA has become trust worthy and frank?
This guy is either stupid and manipulative or smart. However I don't believe he is the head of conservative movement but their symbol.

Israelo plastinian conflict

Either Israel is a little U.S.A or U.S.A is a big Israel.

What next?

The political situation in Iran is so tricky these days. nobody knows what is going to happen next. My impression is that Khatami and the insider reformists are completely losing the ground. We are going to see more conservative presence and down the road the outsider kind of reformist activities will emerge. Iranian people are going to play a crucial role in this conflict. If they step aside ( that is a very real possibility, we have developed this habit from long time ago) and just watch the game, the violent conservative camp is the winner. I feel hopeless and helpless, I wish some kind of miracle happens ( not likely though!).

"Yek seri javan e ehsasati ye shahrestani"

You may guess where this title is coming from. It is commented from HODER Persian blog. I do agree with the content of Hoder's posting about yesterday's riot in Tehran. It is not the time for these violent activities, the most important reason is that the conservative opponent is the master of that game and the civilized rational people are not. The other thing is that all kind of violent expression is going to damage the reformist cause and ...

Anyway what I wanted to say is that I did not like the kind of insulting language that Hoder had used by saying " Bunch of emotional countryside young fellows". Being Ehsasati or emotional is not bad at all specially for young people, it is their drive for pushing forward and it does not need to end up in violent behavior. I am not seeing anything wrong to be from countryside or a place other than Tehran either, as a mater of fact most Iranians are included in that category. The other thing is that most of the time guys who do not have anything to lose are most likely the ones who do engage in courageous undertakings ( any kind of civil polytical activity these days in Iran) which do not need to be violent at all. If the rioters can be generalized with terms and descriptions like emotional ,countryside and young, we should see these riots in other cities which are full of young emotional non Tehrani fellows. But they are happening in Tehran.
As a matter of fact It is very easy to brand people and judge them based on their background or appearance but it is much more positive to use a respectful language and start to look at things more deeply.

Whose fault is this mess anyway?

I got some message from a fellow Iranian concerning what has been happening in Iran all these years. I understand that as an individual we are in the middle of every thing and we can not look at events in Iran in an impartial way, but let's try. We have been living in an autocratic system for such a long time ( more than 2500 years )and it is kind of natural if we have got some related behaviors in our culture. As a whole the result of the revolution was that we replaced a bad regime with another one which was essentially worse ( it could be better and our intent was to get a democratic system). But If we look at that from another viewpoint we may see it as the first partially successful attempt for change of a people ( at least for a couple of months!) that has been loving freedom and living under oppression for centuries. Have we ever been governing ourselves before? Has the Iranians' opinion had any official value ever in this country before? Look ! We just behave and treat our kids and family at home the very same way the authorities treat us in the society. Like it or not our culture and collective behavior have been affected by all these years of living under absolute autocratic rulers. It is not fault of any single person as a leader of revolution or any specific polytical movement or I don't know what. In my opinion , in our case whatever has happened is the fault of Iranian nation as a whole. The average Iranian has missed the target. We have gone stray. Until we get big in number and push forward nothing is going to change and history may repeat itself again and again. However I think it may not be a waste of time if we don't let it go. Just lets don't try to forget anything, if we had worked on our long term memory we could have saved some precious time.

Real time incubation

I was 12 when revolution happened in Iran. As a kid one thing that I could not understand was how come a human being can kill or torture the other humans. I could not believe the stories which were flying around about SAVAK and other tortures and killings and Shah's family specially the stories being told about Ashraf was so unbelievable to me. The post revolution era was a great opportunity for me to see how those kind of behaviors and people are developped and created.
These conservatives and the new Iranian religious and economical Mafia are the very simple guys of the first days of revolution and now just look at them and see what crimes they are capable of comitting.
The lack of experience of Iranian people concering the democratic behavior and their responsibilities just ended up to replacement of a totalitarian system with something worse and now we are paying for that. I try to see the full part of the glass, at the bottom of my heart I believe these lessons are learned and going to be added to the collective memory of Iranian Nation and all the sufferings and pains are not in vain.
Lets dream for better days and democracy and wish for return of Iranians' deserved dignity.

Paying a visit to Iran

Today I told my wife that during this coming Norouz we should go to Iran for a visit. Given our catastrophic economical conditions ( Eftezaah! God bless line of credit !) It is not a reasonable decision to make, at least with the living standards here. But the matter of the fact is that our parents are dangerously getting old ( +70 ) and we are getting more worried about them everyday. I hate being far away in case anything happens ( God forbids!) but it is the faith what do you want to do? At least we could visit them more frequently while they are around.
My older son loves Iran and he believes all the airplanes flying in the sky are going to Iran. He is 3 years and 4 month old and he speaks Farsi very good and just because of the kids population in our familly I am sure when we arrive in Iran he is going to improve a great deal in Farsi.
The bad part of the trip for me is that I can never consider myself as a guest. I don't really like invitations and parties and instead I'd rather to hang around and talk with people. I want to see my friends and get inside the life there and the result is when I return I am tired like hell mentally and phisicaly. I am sure with two kids it is going to be different, I am sure I am going to be more conformist at least for their sake. I remember how embarasing I was for my wife, parents and my in laws during our first visit to Iran, when I said I am not going to go to any familly party and I partially didn't. Later on I knew how much pain I had given to both famillies for being so selfish, I wanted them to understand that I'd got 3 weeks there and I wanted to do wathever I wanted to. Now I let it go, no struggle no conflict I am like a little lamb, specially whatever my parents and kids say during our visit is like law for me (I am exagerating but I try my best).

First days in Canada

I was remembering my first days in Canada. We had applied for immigration to Quebec because I could speak French and when I was applying in Syria I noticed that Quebec immigration center is flying the flies ( Pashe mipparoone!) so I went there and ...
It took us 3 months to get the immigration papers and after 6 months we were ready to move ( me and my wife). We arrived in Montreal. A friend had rented an apartment for us, a little bit expensive but acceptable in our situation. the funny thing was that I started to speak French at the airport ( Mirable at the time) but surprisingly I could not understand a word. I backed off and started to speak English at least everybody was speaking a second language and for me it was easier to communicate. After a couple of months I was used to the strong French accent of Quebeqers and I started timidly to speak French.
The worst part of those days was my first appointment with an immigration officer concerning the employment. Because I already knew speaking French I did not took part in Quebec government's French courses. I got to the office and I started to talk about my situation and the fact that I had not been able to find any job yet. With an arrogant attitude she explained how we were considered under qualified and as an engineer I would better go and find a technician or a simple job and after a few years I should start to attain the high level of qualifications required here in Canada, I was reminded about the difficulties of immigration to Canada too ( something we knew already!). You know what? I was stunned. As an immigration officer she should not talk to me like that. Her impression of immigrants was a bunch of guys coming from nowhere( Poshte kooh) and who don't distinguish their left hands from right and their engineering credentials are equivalent to elementary schools in Canada. Now I see how that woman has been sincere about his feelings and how bad she has been selected for that job. Many people think the very same way here but they don't speak out their minds. However after September 11th I am seeing more of those kind of reactions and talks. Any ways I did not listen to that bitch and instead I followed the recommendations of a fellow compatriot, I applied for a graduate program at Montreal university, after getting my master degrees I got a job quickly. Life is better now and I have realized that like any other place you can find all kind of people here, some people are snub some people are not, just open up, don't generalize and try to have a strong connection to your own ethnic community or people like yourself.
Anyways you should work your way out and prove that you deserve what you are asking for.

First generation immigrants

As a first generation immigrant we face a big cultural challenge in life. I am sure our kids are much more cooler and they won't see such a cultural barrier.
We had a lunch get to gether at our new start up company this noon. I am the only middle eastern and with a Chinese guy ( who was absent ) we are the only immigrants there. I could not stay there just because I could not fit into that group. The jokes the interests and all the rest are not simply mine. Sometimes because I don't want to be rude or because after all they are nice guys I hang out with them and participate in collective joking around and stuff but it is not me.

My Sons

My younger son ( Rayan) has just turned 1 month. You just forget how they grow up. I am sure we have had the same experience with the first one ( Danial) but everything is just new and interesting again. The good thing is that Danial ( 3 years old ) is showing much more affection twoard his brother ( Dadash Rayan) than we expected. Showing Danial his own baby pictures and comparing them to Rayan helped a lot.

Americans and Canadians

Have you noticed how much Canadians insist on being different from Americans? Don't you think they are saying that and repeat it all the time just because in fact they are very similar?
Ask me, they are no different. The only part of Canada which may claim being different is Quebec. Common origin, language, geopolitical situation and very common economical interests have been important defining elements for shaping these two nations. As an imigrant I see no difference, as a matter of fact the differences between Canadians and Americans are not more than the local differences in U.S.A itself.

God Bless Oil!

This morning on my way to work I was listening to Radio, some guy from UN was complaining about the G8 summit leaders and the promises which are made there and at the time are huge but nobody really sees anything afterward. He was telling the reporter that the last year summit's focus was Africa and this year they are talking about Iraq with the same enthusiasm. Meanwhile they have not done anything in Africa ( more than what they were doing of course). You remember the same thing happened in Afghanestan too. No constructions yet. Destruction is much easier than construction. Africa is the western world's responsibility ,they have been abusing this continent for such a long time, they owe a lot to those people. It is time to go with long term solutions, it is time to recognize that we are living on the same planet and in long run whatever happens at some point is going to affect all the planet sooner or later, in a way or another.

In some sense Iraq is the luckiest, because of the oil it will attract western nations for construction and whatever they say about their love in human values I keep saying God bless oil.

Khatami is done, get off the train!

What is the point here? What Khatami is doing?
What we are seeing is that the hardliners are abusing Khatami's patience, at least reform camp is saying that. But what do you think Khatami will do if he has to chose between a nonreligeous democratic government and a conservative ruled Islamic one?
I don't really know what the answer is but I feel he would prefer to stay only Islamic rather than only democratic.

No principles!

If it was not because of the animosity toward the reform movement and the will of nation, the conservative faction had reestablished the relation with U.S. long time ago. They are ready to do anything except submission to people and nation. For the time being name of U.S. is like a no good sticker they put on reformers' front to punch them out of the ring. But when they are done U.S. is going to be enough friendly and charming to have romance with in public. Look at Ayatollah Hakim. He has submitted quietly like a good boy to fellow American soldiers. Badr devision are going to give up their arms and I am sure after some time they will keep quiet completely. As long as they can do Ashura and Tasua and they get Khoms and Zekat and they have general population under control, life is beautiful.
Something like national interest does not exist in their dictionaries.

God bless IRAN